The Most Idiotic PR Email We Ever Received
From its initial premise to the execution and intention: This is undoubtedly the most trash PR spam we received so far.
As a music magazine, we receive dozens of emails every week promoting new music, pushing news, and providing reporting opportunities. Combing through this never-ending flood in the inbox is maybe the most tiresome task running Negative White.
However, once in a while, a PR email stands out—and today’s contestant is so bad, so moronic, that we can’t withhold you of its stupidity. Let’s start with the headline:
«Your taste in music invites bacteria into your home.»
Intriguing, without a doubt. So, what’s lying underneath this bold claim?
«Are your favourite Spotify playlists turning your home into a breeding ground for bacteria? Experts at Company X sound the alarm and warn of a surprising link between music streaming habits and household hygiene.»
Yes, I’ve censored the company’s name for reasons I’ll explain shortly.
But the email goes on with a quote by the company’s CEO, who cannot be found anywhere on the web: «Different music makes people feel different things—that’s a fact. What is surprising, however, is how these feelings translate into behaviours that change the microbiome of our environment.»
The PR article then explains how it works, claiming the following:
- Relaxing music reduces the heart rate, and we move more calmly, allowing dust and bacteria to settle.
- Lively music raises the heartbeat, and we move more hectically, which then stirs up dust and displaces bacteria so that they may find more suitable breeding grounds.
- Music can also affect bacteria that live on our skin. Emotional responses to music can make us sweat, creating a moist environment where bacteria like to colonise.
The article then suggests ways to mitigate the risks with handy tips like balanced playlists, regular dusting, and skincare. Thanks so much; what would I do without you?!
AI-generated SEO Bullshit
The article’s premise is already so idiotic that I had to look deeper at the article and the company behind this «research paper». Yes, they really call it that.
The text is stuffed with obvious keywords like Spotify or organisations like Harvard Health, The Daily Beast, and CNN, which apparently should provide some legitimacy but are only in the article to optimise the text for search engines. The general practice is called SEO, Search Engine Optimisation.
The article, written in German, clearly shows signs of being generated with an AI tool. The sentence structure is unnecessarily complicated and weird, and the overuse of bullet points is also something AI-generated text is prone to.
A short experiment with ChatGPT offers similar results in text as the email we received, boldly voicing claims of research, studies, and experts—obviously without any sources.
A Cycle of Garbage
The email came from an address that leads us to a crappy content factory called WireRelay which pumps out garbage like «Experts warn: answering calls with your right ear could cause brain damage!».
But the most obvious giveaway that we deal with some otherworldly bullshit here is Company X. What is this company actually doing?
They offer AI chatbots for influencers where users can pay $10 to chat with an AI version of their influencer. So far, they offer two influencers you can chat with. Impressive! Nothing in the article remotely has to do with their business, nor do they have any music, hygiene, or health expertise.
Unfortunately, a quick search reveals that this article has been published several times by self-proclaimed media outlets, perpetuating the trash. Some even cared so little that the final ask in the email was included: «Please refer to URL of Company X if you decide to use the research.»
It’s a whole shitty ecosystem: content farms promoting fake business with fake research published by fake media websites.
Edition #109
Today, we recommend the new songs by Tusks, GHLOW, Pina Palau, Clocktopus, and Michele Ducci.
This week’s edition has two faces: a loud, overwhelming, maybe even aggressive one and a soft, tender, calm one. Yet both are equally intriguing—from the sensitive ballads of Tusks and Michele Ducci to the raw power of GHLOW and the gigantic opulence of Clocktopus.
You can listen to today's curation on selected streaming services:
Spotify • Apple Music • YouTube Music • Bandcamp
Tusks – Body Ache
Featured last year with the exceptional Artificial Flame, Tusks’ next album release, Gold, is coming closer. Body Ache is the latest and last single, perfectly incorporating the essence of the British singer-songwriter’s beauty: A slow ballad maximising effect through radical minimalism. Tusks leaves room for brief silences and places subtle decorations into the song’s composition.
GHLOW – Levitate
Last week, the Stockholm-based duo GHLOW released their new album, Levitate, including a namesake track. The sound of Emille de Blanche and Nikolay Evdokimov is abrasive. The guitar screams and lurches like sirens in the night. Chainsaw synths. Levitate lingers between the raw energy of punk and the melancholy of post-punk—but primarily, the song is an unstoppably forward-pushing bolt of energy.
Michele Ducci – River
Italian musician Michele Ducci used to be one-half of the electro-pop band M+A. Now, Ducci switches lanes, pursuing another sonic vision that results in River, the first single of his upcoming album, Sive. The song is a hauntingly stunning piano ballad, highlighting Ducci’s whispering-smokey voice. River flows slowly yet with intense intimacy, providing a calming counterpoint to NYC’s overstimulation, which prompted the song.
Clocktopus – My Riders
The Dutch band Clocktopus is a beast with many tentacles, each bringing different sounds to the table. The collective built a studio in the Thai jungle and recorded an album. And the result—as demonstrated in the track My Riders—sounds incredible. A groovy banjo hook meets raspy vocals until the composition explodes in shouts and massive brass lines, and strings add depth in the background: It’s an overwhelming thing.
Pina Palau – Get A Dog
Swiss singer-songwriter Pina Palau just released her second album, Get A Dog. The namesake song is a heartfelt indie-folk song, warm and earthy, accompanied by captivating storytelling. Driven by a steady beat, the slow electric guitar spreads tenderness, while the acoustic one indulges in playfulness. Get A Dog warps around you like a blanket and crawls under your skin.
Dressed Like Boys Debuts Heartfelt First Single, «Nando»
Belgian musician Jelle Denturck premieres the debut single, «Nando», with his solo project Dressed Like Boys today.
Jelle Denturck, a Belgian musician, is known as the frontman of the indie-rock band DIRK. The band plays a raw, fast-paced sound. However, Denturck hits different tunes with his new solo project, Dressed Like Boys.
The debut single, Nando, will be released tomorrow, celebrating its exclusive premiere today with Negative White.
The musician explains his sonic love letter to the most trusted people: «Being in a relationship will inevitably cause turbulence. That’s what Nando is about. We all suffer insecurities, injuries, doubts and regrets for the sake of love.»
As Dressed Like Boys, Denturck displays tender honesty and intimacy. He wants to write «truthful, heartfelt songs that sound like they’ve always existed.» Exploring the themes of personal freedom, relationships, and homosexuality, Dressed Like Boys is not a mere outlet for an artistic vision but a vehicle for introspection and reflection.
Nando, can you hear the drums
Hold me while we're dancing
Until the morning light
If you like
Inspired by pop and rock legends of the 1970s, such as, Bowie or Elton John, Nando combines fragility and vulnerability with expression, and large parts. There are soft, reduced parts, with only a piano accompanying his voice. But the composition builds to a full-blown arrangement with all the flourish of pop—vocalising choirs, strings, and escalating drums—before collapsing again into simplicity.
Nando is beautiful, like any piano pop-rock ballad. It is, at times, overwhelming in its burst of opulence. But even in this big moment, it always feels close to the heart and never out of touch or put on a pedestal. It is filled with authenticity.
Edition #108
Today, we recommend the new songs by Elio Ricca, benzii, Marseille, Linn Koch-Emmery, and Midas Fall.
This Sunday morning, we present you with a broad collection of sonic artistry, from driven rhythms and perfectly crafted guitar sounds to stomping beats and otherworldly soundscapes.
Elio Ricca – Duck (Forever for a Day)
Swiss duo Elio Ricca's new single, Duck (Forever for a Day), combines the best qualities of post-punk and indie rock with a pinch of wonky sounds. The result feels exhilarating: upbeat and sinister at the same time but highly addictive.
benzii – beine spüren
Experimental techno artist benzii is a familiar name here. She continues to refine her danceable yet introspective sound. In her new single, beine spüren, the German dabbles for the first time with her native language. Dreamy yet pumping.
Marseille – Monkey In The Middle
Marseille, an up-and-coming UK band, conjure the swagger of acts like The Stone Roses. Monkey In The Middle builds up a towering wall of sound—a heavy, full-bodied rock song with outstanding guitar work that still neatly incorporates the indie vibe.
Linn Koch-Emmery – Happy
Sweden's Linn Koch-Emmery made it impossible not to pick her new song, Happy, today—even shortly after Ebay Armour. Her bedroom-whisper voice meets a multi-layered composition and, again, an otherworldly melodic beauty.
Midas Fall – Atrophy
Scottish outfit Midas Fall have released their latest album, Cold Waves Divide Us, filled with astounding songs between post-rock and ambient soundscapes. Atrophy is a stunning epos that makes you feel small and insignificant.
You can listen to today's curation on selected streaming services:
Spotify • Apple Music • YouTube Music • Bandcamp